Wednesday, 7 December 2011


When a mother carries her baby, you would see females flocking around her like flies around a piece of meat exposed saying ,''awwww so cute'', but you can NEVER see me do that,I just stand there all so passive.I never know how to interact with kids,do I talk to them like adults,what do I say,how do I act? I know people see babies as cute angels,the small fingers, the tiny feet and super cute clothes that is what people see,but not me,WHY? when I was younger I never liked carrying babies they just drool and mess up my clothes!!!!! and why do people think that is cute?? plus I never thought they were fine especially the first few days of birth,to me they just looked old and wrinkled but as they grow older,they do become cute.Some weeks ago,my friend that just had a baby, gave her baby to me to hold because she wanted to cook,imagine!!! me of all people, just when I was trying to relax with the baby in my arms, it decided to poop!!!!!!!! I almost dropped .2 years ago,when I was with a friend and her 5 year old daughter, she wanted to do a running competition with me and i loooooooooove running, so she told me no cheating and I accepted, Yemi blew the whistle and the race started, I ran as fast as my tiny legs could take me,with all the nasal flaring,panting and congratulating myself that I won the race.Yemi was like Dee why did you do that, and I was like, ''ermm excuse me,she said no cheating,so I ran my best''. I did not see anything wrong with what I had done because I do not know how to act with kids,so that day,I finally learnt that you should let kids win a
I seriously do need help with kids,they are so innocent and can ask the weirdest questions, like my aunt's son who went to the pharmacy with his mom and saw sanitary pad(the type his mom had at home) and asked her infront of the pharmacist if she wasnt going to buy it,she should have respected herself by saying NO but she underestimated the child she had, by asking him if he knew what it was for,this cute boy looks up proudly at his mom,his eyes beaming and says,''its that thing you use to do like this...'' interlocking his fingers,starts moving his hands underneath his crotch in a back and forth motion and his mom is RIGHT IN FRONT of the pharmacist looking all so embarassed or another scenario where this young rich spoilt girl I met in an eatery that was screaming at her mom to stop eating that she was TOO FAT, at the same time holding the HUGE fat folds her mom had at her abdominal region showing it off to whoever cared to see.MY mom also had her own fair share of embarassment from us,when we were younger, my mom travelled to lagos and left us home alone with the househelp who was also in charge of her shop she had when we were growing up,on the day my mom returned, whilst the house help was being ''toasted'' by a random, sex starved dude that could not speak correct english,we were running wild like a pack of wolves,I had designed a top and skirt for myself from black plastic bags and was rocking it proudly,my moms shop had been ransacked and we found condoms the nigerian popular GOLD CIRCLE CONDOMS she had in her shop and curiousity took the better part of us and we opened it and noticed they looked like balloons,so we thought the best thing was use them as such,we blew air into it with our MOUTHS!!! and me the inquisitive one,always wanting to know, wondered why it was so greasy,I even licked it to know if it was sweet...imagine!!!!!!!! after geting enough GOLD CIRCLE CONDOM BALLOONS,we started running all around the place with our string tied ballons with FUNNY POINTING TIPS,we were a sight to behold,especially me with my plastic bag clothes.When my mom saw us,she almost fainted because she did not know the village looking kids were her children and to think she was gone for JUST a day,she beat us so badly that evening,I can never forget...basically kids are fun to be with but not to me because I really do not know how to deal with them.I really do hope I change when I have

1 comment:

eljay said...

Dee I can not believe u told d story of d waterproof clothes. OMG momi dealt wit us dat day. Remember d shock on momis face wen we ran from the pharmacy to hug was classic...lmao... Dose wre gud tyms